The Devastating NO

Children are born pure, bright, carefree, imaginative, confident and ambitious. From the moment their mind started working, their imagination continuously works. You would see them imitating whatever and whoever they see, be it by words or actions. They are just being kids, having fun, wanting to be who they want to be each moment. Their mind could think of thousands of ideas a day.

Father and Son

Kids could be influenced with what they see, what they hear and what they experience. They copy what they hear; they do what they see because at this stage they think everything is right. This is called modeling, everything that gets stored in their mind is from their experiences, words they hear, and things they see while growing up.

Growing up, kids would start to dream big dreams. You would often hear that they would want to be a doctor, astronaut, fireman, police, dentist, rock star, athlete, own buildings and resorts, etc. They feel so happy when they think of these and when they share these dreams to people. Spirits are sky high that this would really happen soon. For them, nothing is impossible.

Unfortunately, no matter how high their belief in their dreams, the fire of desire eventually dies down and they start dreaming smaller and smaller. Why does this happen? It is because of the environment. This includes family, friends, school, village, TV, etc. Society is dictating what you should do when you reach a certain age. By this age you should be doing this and that. THAT AIN’T RIGHT!

Another very sad reality is that the people who crushes or steals the dreams of kids are their own parents. Parents always say the word “NO” and more often than not they don’t explain why. This single word hurts kids and crushes their imagination and dreams.

For example, a kid wants to play basketball with friends because he wants to be a pro-athlete and just to have fun with friends. The kid asks permission from his parents if he could play outside after school, but the mother replies with “No, it’s very dangerous, you might get hurt”. Although the boy’s mother cares so much, this isn’t helping the child’s confidence with himself and his dreams. What her mother said gets stored in his mind and he will carry it until he gets old. For him, basketball could not be a dream anymore because it is very dangerous and he might get hurt. How sad is that?

Discipline

Another example, a girl wants to attend ballet lessons or piano lessons during summer. This girl wanted to be a ballerina and an excellent musician. She keeps dreaming about this even before summer came. When she asked her parents if she could attend these workshops, the reply she got was “No honey, we don’t have money for that, those are only for rich people, and that couldn’t contribute in your life after college.” Immediately, the girl’s dream gets crushed. For her, being a ballerina and an artist are not for her. Instead it is just for rich people.

I would often hear parents tell their kids “you can’t be a model, you’re fat” or “you can’t be a basketball player, you’re too small and unskilled” or worse “we don’t have money for that”. These statements are brutal but this really happens and it doesn't help kids at all. This just pounds their spirits. Imagine the people they love are the one’s who does this to them.

These are just some examples but you get what I am saying don’t you? With those few words, it can affect kids in very big way. Their self-esteem will be in an all time low until they grow old. Why don’t parents just let their children be who they really want to be and just support all the way?SUPPORT is all they need! -DE

Support

“Anything is possible in a world of dreams.” - Mike Cunningham